Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
