Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Randomize
