i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
