I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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