so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
