im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
