i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
