He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize