I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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