She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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