Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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