playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
