Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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