She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
