I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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