Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
