Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
i think we sleep fucked last night...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
