This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
