he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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