It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
