you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
