You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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