its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
