i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
