I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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