will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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