I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
