i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
