so that wasnt chicken after all
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
