So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
