you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
All I want is dick and wine.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize