So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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