I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
operation have a gay friend backfired
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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