Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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