it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
