love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize