So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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