haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
