so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
My balls are so social today.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
