Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
