New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
