Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
