Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize