with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
