I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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