I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Barsexuality is the new black.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
