There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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