6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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