Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
