I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
