GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
