It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I checked into jail on foursquare
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize