I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
